Sex is a wonderful thing! So why does it often feel “wrong” or “weird” to talk about it? Even while reading this article one might hide in a room alone or try to make sure no one else can see that they’re reading about S-E-X. Back when “50 Shades of Grey” was all the rage, I remember a fellow co-worker being uncomfortable that I was reading it around others on my lunch break. I was shocked! It’s human nature and people do it every single day! Why is it so wrong to talk about it?
A couple of weeks ago, a client told me that he couldn’t talk to his wife about their sex life and he was wondering if a sex therapist could help. This client is older and has recently had a stroke. He has hemiplegia (one side of his body is paralyzed) so his physical abilities are much different for him.
Here are some of the reasons I thought a sex therapist could help him:
1) opens up the line of communication between both partners
2) gives ideas and options for new, safe positions
3) offers ideas for new ways to pleasure each other
Although this client seemed interested and hopeful that his sex life would improve, he was still not interested in talking to someone else about it due to the “awkwardness”.
In the Toronto Star recently, a young man named Tim with Cerebral Palsy and his wife Natalie, talk about their hopes to break down the myth that people with disabilities are not sexual. When Tim and Natalie first started their relationship, they too had questions about sex. They were both disappointed with the lack of information available, and they together started the Rose Centre for Love, Sex, and Disability.
THEIR MISSION STATEMENT…
The Rose Centre is a charitable organization that focuses on positive representations of love, sex and disability. We recognize the multiple barriers to participation in love, sex and relationships for disabled people and the lack of positive discussion around disability and sexuality. We also believe that sex and relationships can be fun and enjoyable for anyone. The organization provides programming and events which support this mission and that are open and welcoming to everyone.
When I contacted Natalie and Tim, they confirmed their mission was to improve the love and sex life for people with disabilities and they would happy to assist anyone with questions. Due to their recent appearance in The Star, they have become overwhelmed with people interested in learning more. They are passionate to help people feel sexy and enjoy sex, no matter the circumstances. There is help out there for all who want to improve their sex life, but first, you have to be open to talk about it!